Getting Back Together With Your Ex Lover

The idea of getting back with your ex boyfriend might be enticing since it serves a chance of rekindling all those exciting moments both of you shared together. However, both of you should embark on serious soul searching to assess whether getting back together is a good idea after all.

There have been numerous instances when couples have successfully continued their relationship post break up. However, more often than naught, couples get back together without resolving their past differences that lead to the break up. Therefore, it would be prudent on your part to take out time and analyzing whether getting back together is the right way to go forward. Hoping that getting back together will automatically put your past demons to rest is not the correct approach.  You need to deal with the following listed points before getting back together.

Healing past wounds

There should have been a reason why both of you broke up.  If these issues still remain, then chances are likely that the relationship will not last the second time around. Both of you must find common ground in resolving those issues or decide mutually that the issues of the past do not hold water.  Showing remorse over the past behavior will not guarantee that the person has changed. There should be tangible acts to second the act of repentance.

Toning down expectations

Try to start the relationship on a clean slate which means the unnecessary baggage of the past should not come in your way. Build the symbiotic relationship based on friendship and trust. Try setting realistic short term goals and work towards achieving them.

Be practical when making decisions

Do not be dictated by emotions when making mature decisions. With the history both of you share, you might be tempted to be swayed by emotions when the occasion presents itself.  Try to be reasonable in your approach and make the decisions that might affect both of you in a balanced manner after discussing all its pros and cons. You might at times be blinded by emotion but you should keep this in check to avoid making hasty decisions that might prove to be a bane later on.

If both of you are planning to get back together, ensure that you are mentally ready to give it another chance. This time there should be a wholehearted effort in going the distance and both of you must talk it through. However, if for some reason it does not work out, the emotional pain associated with the loss this time around would be manageable.

It might be our inherent desire to actually see our boyfriend show a change in his approach.  However, this should not cloud our judgment if we do not notice any significant change since allowing things to drift in the same manner would cause us more heartbreak down the road.  Try being honest with each other and avoid the pitfalls that once lead to your breakup.